keeping the rush

In the type of job I am currently involved in, it is not an unusual sight to see zombies walking. Of course this is not like those eerie ghost stories you hear about companies. Dead people walking are common in our company- those people who just go to work and maintain their jobs. They just sit in the cubicles and take breaks when needed. They eat and try to even start communication with others. But they are dead. How come?

Because they lost their hearts.

When asked, they didn't even know how it happened. They somehow just lost everything they wanted to live for. Therefore, they become the living dead. Those who takes up space and try to survive the day. They lost their goals and visions. They just merely work and exist for the sake of it.

How this happened no one really knows. The process ain't as clear cut as that of a cook book. There is no obvious step-by-step procedure. The only sure thing is: I do not want to become a zombie. I refuse to just do what is being told. I refuse to not enjoy every second. I refuse to let my job define who I am.

That is why I am making an effort to maintain my humanity.

Yesterday, I asked Tin to go with me so that we could buy stuff for school. I also asked her if she wanted to come to our planned event in QC Circle today. When I told Tin our itinerary that day, she laughed. She was thinking that I was setting her up with a lousy joke. I told her I was serious. An even bigger smile appeared. She seemed excited with the idea. I mean, what could excite a child more than the idea that ten grown men and women will play childhood games?

Yes. We played the normal children games that the Filipinos could offer. We played shatong baseball- that freaky combination of typical baseball and shato. We also played patintero. Young people actually enjoy this since the enemies don't plan like adults. We ended up not having any score in every team since we had everthing planned out. People always ended up being stuck in one of the spaces since the patotot imprisons them there. We also played Moro-Moro, a rather popular game for kids nowadays. We ran and ran as if there was no tomorrow. I was the hero of our team since I saved the team when the majority of the team members were tagged. After we made complete fools of ourselves, we went home. Energy-wise we were drained, but something happened that day. Somehow somewhere or sometime in the games we were playing, it went back. As if blood started to rush in my veins again, I regained my vision and I saw my goal again.

I felt alive again.

karl.30may2009